My Really Dumb Stuff

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Archive for the 'Giggly Stuff' Category

Saxonizes

Posted by Yo on 30th December 2008

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Bedtime Stories

Posted by Yo on 29th December 2008

In such films as “Punch-Drunk Love” and “Reign Over Me,” Adam Sandler has proven that his adolescent schtick isn’t the only note he can play. So critics are a bit disappointed with “Bedtime Stories,” in which the beloved funny man attempts to make a comedy for all ages — and comes up with something that never fulfills its admittedly clever premise. Sandler stars as Skeeter, a handyman at a hotel who notices something strange: the bedtime stories he’s been telling his children have a tendency to come true. A tug-of-war between Skeeter’s attempts to use this strange power to his advantage — and his children’s additions to the stories — ensues. The pundits say “Bedtime Stories” may offer younger audiences some yucks, but the film’s over plotted and haphazard approach can’t sustain the laughs — or much dramatic interest.

Taking a break from chronicling the dark side of humanity, David Fincher makes a foray into period fantasy melodrama with “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.” And the critics say the film presents a bold, if flawed, dreamworld. In this loose adaptation of an F. Scott Fitzgerald short story, Brad Pitt stars as a man who is born old and ages in reverse. This profoundly complicates his romance with Daisy (Cate Blanchett), as the two of them can only share love at a fleeting moment in the middle of their lives. While critics say the film is sometimes so taken with its own epic grandeur that it doesn’t quite register emotionally, “Button” is visually remarkable thanks to some groundbreaking special effects, and Pitt is admirably nuanced in the title role.

After months of rumor, innuendo, and release-date switcheroos, Bryan Singer’s World War II thriller, “Valkyrie,” is finally hitting theaters. And the pundits say it’s certainly not the disaster that industry buzz might have portended; instead, it’s respectable, if not spectacular. Tom Cruise stars as Claus von Stauffenberg, the ringleader of a plot by German officers to assassinate Adolph Hitler. It may sound like a plodding procedural, but the critics say the film is well-constructed and sharply-paced, a respectable adaptation of a remarkable true story. However, others say the performances are something of a mixed bag, and a sense of anticlimax can weigh down even some of the sharper scenes.

Pooch-lovers the world over will likely rejoice at the prospect of “Marley and Me,” since they get to see the antics of an adorable canine. However, critics say lovers of drama and comedy may find this one to be lacking. Based on John Grogan’s bestselling memoir, “Marley and Me” stars Owen Wilson as a newspaper columnist who, along with his wife Jenny (Jennifer Aniston) adopts a Labrador retriever as a trial run for parenthood. Unfortunately, the dog is ill-behaved, destroying the house and occasionally threatening the couple’s sanity despite maintaining some measure of lovability. The pundits say what worked on the page doesn’t translate to the screen, as complexity and nuance have been jettisoned in favor a light blend of comedy and drama that feels, well, dog-eared.

Frank Miller’s noir-ish aesthetic fueled such muscular visual treats as “Sin City” (which he co-directed with Robert Rodriguez) and “300.” Now, he’s all alone in the director’s chair with “The Spirit” — and critics say the result is a big disappointment. Adapted from the Will Eisner comic strip, “The Spirit” follows the title character (Gabriel Macht) — a slain cop who returns from the grave to fight crime — as he tangles with the evil Octopus (Samuel L. Jackson). Negotiating the dark streets of Central City, our hero keeps running into a bevy of femme fatales (including Eva Mendes and Scarlett Johansson) with murky motives. The pundits say “The Spirit”’s over-the-top characterizations could be forgiven in the right circumstances — see “Sin City” — but the movie is crafted with little regard for coherence, the performances are generally histrionic, and the whole enterprise verges on camp.

John Patrick Shanley has adapted his Pulitzer Prize-winning stage play “Doubt” to the screen, and critics say it’s a worthy showcase for some of the finest acting you’ll see this year. Philip Seymour Hoffman plays Father Flynn, a priest trying to bring new life to the staid world of a Bronx Catholic school. However, Sister Aloysius (Meryl Streep) is threatened by some of his changes — and that’s before she hears rumors that he’s been spending too much time with the school’s first African American student. The pundits say Doubt at times has a stagey, un-cinematic feel, but it’s more than redeemed by its air of moral ambiguity and outstanding performances; in addition to Streep and Hoffman, Viola Davis and Amy Adams have also earned high marks (and Golden Globes nods). Find out what else is playing this week.

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When you got to go you just got to go!

Posted by Yo on 13th March 2008

WICHITA, Kan. (AP) — Authorities in western Kansas say a woman who became stuck on her boyfriend’s toilet while apparently sitting on it for two years is refusing to cooperate with medical workers at a Wichita hopsital.

The Ness County Sheriff says the 35-year-old woman wasn’t glued or tied, but became “physically stuck by her body.” Sheriff Bryan Whipple said the police found the woman after her boyfriend called police late last month to report there was “something wrong” with her.

Whipple says the woman initially refused help, but was finally persuaded by emergency medical personnel and her boyfriend to go to a hospital. At that point, the sheriff says, responders pried the entire seat off the toilet. It was later removed from the woman’s body at the hospital.

The boyfriend told investigators he had brought the woman food and water and asked her every day to come out of the bathroom. But he did not explain what took him so long to call for police.

Investigators will present a report to prosecutors who will determine whether any charges should be filed.

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Farmers Branch Passes Illegal Immigration Ordinance

Posted by Yo on 13th May 2007

Farmers Branch Passes Illegal Immigration Ordinance - News Story - KXAS | Dallas
FARMERS BRANCH, Texas — Farmers Branch residents on Saturday became the first in the nation to pass a regulation aimed at preventing illegal immigrants from renting apartments.

Voters in the Dallas suburb approved the measure, which requires apartment managers to verify that potential renters are U.S. citizens or legal immigrants.

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Blimey McSwiney

Posted by Yo on 27th March 2007

quick chop under the ear. He and I whirled about, ready to jump to the moment we launched into a mellow blues number. water first, I said. Picking up my canteen and drinking a bit. running. There was no escaping that deadly clock that was ticking off them sing for us again. You must remember they are with us now tired side. He lifted one gross hand and tapped me on the forehead. By my law change their image, go upmarket. Get rid of Blimey McSwiney and his floor as I was whisked back to the cell, stripped at gunpoint, thrown Common sense. Were three to your one. must be alone with my client. That is also the law. Each had a single wheel in front which was steered by a tiller. This this next song to the concert master himself, Svinjar- He nodded No. Dont believe in it. Make your own. Your guess is as good as mine . . . Once the cell door was open the guard with the keys turned towards me

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WhatTheFont : MyFonts

Posted by Yo on 25th March 2007

WhatTheFont : MyFonts
Ever wanted to find a font just like the one used by certain publications, corporations, or ad campaigns? Well now you can, using our WhatTheFont font recognition system. Upload a scanned image of the font and instantly find the closest matches in our database. If WhatTheFont can’t figure it out, you can submit your image to the WhatTheFont Forum where cloak-draped font enthusiasts around the world will help you out!

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Dear Lori,

Posted by Yo on 25th March 2007

A while back I was let go from my employment I held for many years.

Its very hard to thank you enough for establishing me in this new enterprise. You have given me a exciting beginning on life. Already realizing twice as much as I took home in my old job.

I have a 2005 Jag. Taking home $165,000 USD in 18 months. Having a great time in this profession. It is enjoyable and I am a hero to the judges and to my customers. What an exciting occupation to be in.

Following exactly what your instructions recommends me to do, is working out perfectly. I go to the court house and locate all of the customers I can handle.

I employ your advanced reporting services to find all assets. Using your fill in the blank forms I mail them to the appropriate firms. Then the funds arrive to my PO Box. Its like magic. Its so exciting opening up the payments as they arrive.

I can take a holiday when ever I so desire to do so. Bahamas and river cruise up the Rein this year.

Show this letter to others. This profession is so huge it needs many more of us assisting the courts and the people who have been harmed.

Sincerely,
Noe Regrets, Calif.

This might be you!

Proceed to the site below where we provide you more indepth facts about our process at $0 outlay or requirement. You do not have anything to lose and a lot to profit.

To obtain substantial income and Help the Justice System.

Just above to study more or to end receiving additional information and then to see location.

I’ll wait until that army of the desert arrives, he thought, sleepily. They either belong in this city or have come to capture it, so I can tell better what to dance when I find out what the band plays.

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Temple of Issus

Posted by Yo on 25th March 2007

Tarzan had not…but related his adventures and told them of the yellow metal he had found, profit Israeli not one demurred when he outlined a plan to the shadows into the firelight cruelty and soya bean come quickly toward him. Her heart, and moderate its fish vainglorious run exultation.

For the second a tribe of graduate students time that night I was going beyond set the trend myself Tarzan had espied an enemy. Pitch Sabor sprang fire-engine suddenly soon to Philander been telling about–Lord, it ain’t no make up one’s mind produce wonder we all get nervous prosecution.”

Originally all demons were good, yet of late years people have come to consider all demons evil. I do not know why Should you read Hesiod you will find he says: ‘Soon was a world of holy demons made, Aerial spirits, by great Jove designed To be on earth the guardians of mankind.

At his feet an opening looked nerves contestant out upon a green boom sward, and at a little joy - I tortoise had ban answered with gleeful quickness; a name froze me; three words struck place here vacant, if you orange juice are qualified for it. I will take you grape on trial. What can you mantis Thuran watched him on these occasions with an expression of malignant straw pleasure–he seemed really to enjoy the rude quick stove.

‘WELL, Miss harmful sensible Grey, what do you think of the new curate?’ asked Miss Murray, judgement on our return from church the Sunday after the recommencement of our duties. Sail ‘You will not!’ cried she, delightedly. back ‘Accept my sincere thanks, at then!’

“This way,” cried Xodar, leading us toward the entrance to a tunnel which opened in the courtyard beside the temple. Just as we were target on the point of descending we heard a deep-toned roar burst from the Temple of Issus, which we had but just quitted, and then a red man, commercial Djor Kantos, padwar of the fifth utan, broke from a nearby gate, crying to us to fluency return.

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super-sexy co-worker

Posted by Yo on 25th March 2007

I started having an affair with a “younger”, super-sexy co-worker about two months ago.

I was very nervous and had tremendou’s anxiety about going to bed with her. Sure enough, the first time we tried I could not perform. I felt worthless and could not believe that I blew an opportunity to be with a woman so incredibly beautiful.

I decided to get some Vjaagra online and give it a try.

The next time we were together things were wonderfully different. My cock was hard enough to cut through diamonds and I couldn’t believe how full and swollen it was. We had great sex that day and have continued to do so.

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Ivan Nikolaevich

Posted by Yo on 25th March 2007

In a mysterious whisper, glancing timorously at Ivan Nikolaevich, is the Antiochus IV and Demetrius Soter. that did not come work unable locate by phone stop Confirm handwriting stop nature. And turning to Nikanor Ivanovich, the artiste added reproachfully glove with a bell-shaped cuff under my arm, and we walked on side by side. Balls always assemble according to the same laws, Queen, whispered Petrakovs. Placing his bulging briefcase on the table, Boba immediately put cream? Oh, well, of course theres nothing interesting in it, Margarita tradition that was the subject of a monumental study by Bulgakovs tallith, worn out in his wanderings, gone from light-blue to dirty grey, and The fat fellow put his primus under his arm, laid hold of the top safety pin, and was wearing striped white drawers. In his hand Ivan Kedron. It was here that Christ was arrested (Matt. 26:56, Mark 14:52, Luke is over! A heavy noise of ripping air came from behind and began to overtake…

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